Kill Bill? More like Kill Mitch… With Boredom…

by Mitch on 23/04/2004

Image courtesy of IMDB

Don’t click the continue reading link unless you have seen the movie, it contains spoilers.

Okay, in case the topic doesn’t completely give it away, I just got back from seeing Kill Bill part 2. After watching Kill Bill part 1, and thoroughly enjoying it, I expected great things from Quentin Tarantino’s sequel, but what I got was a cinematic slap in the face. It was like a never-ending James Kirk Captains log. In short, it was utter crap.

Sure, the old saying goes, “when you expect to much from something, expect dissapointment,” or some bullshit like that. But from Quentin Tarantino you can’t help but expect a lot, the man really is a complete genius and from the interviews I have seen from him, he is a damn nice guy.

This is my blow by blow analysis as to why Kill Bill Vol. 1 kicked Vol. 2’s little ass…
Vol 1: It was an action movie, therefor there was action, duh.
Vol 2: Supposedly a sequel to an action movie, but controlled by dialog.

Vol 1: Plot. It had one. It was there and it was easy to see and to understand.
Vol 2: Plot. It had one, but it quite often got lost and confused. It also used the old QT timeline a little too much, in that things became a little blurred.

Vol 1: Plot holes. There were none, everything came together in a tight little package.
Vol 2: “Just watch out for the plot holes Betty! You’ll have to go around!” What the hell? The plot just fell apart. I am sorry, but when Beatrice fights with Elle, where the hell did the snake go? Did it just cease to exist until it made it’s glorious comeback in time to spit at Beatrice? Pfft, gimme a break!

Vol 1: The talking was done well. There was dialog and it was usefull to the plot and fast paced. When watching an action movie, no one wants to listen to them justify everything they do for three quarters of the movie – it’s boring.
Vol 2: Well… I just… Think… That…. The… Dialog… Was too… Slow… And… Never… End….ing… It was an… Utter… Nightmare… To… Listen… To…. James…. Tee…. Kirk…. Could… Not… Have… Done… Better…. Himself…

Whenever getting your hopes up, there is always a risk of disappointment, but I could never have been prepared for this. It’s like waiting all year for Christmas and instead of getting an Xbox you get gold fish – it hurts, right down deep. I haven’t felt this disappointed since I waited for 8 weeks for the Harry Potter book to come out, only to find it was the most awful thing ever written.

All in all, I give Kill Bill Vol. 1: 4 spuds out of 4!

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However, I give Kill Bill Vol. 2: A meager 1 spud out of 4, and I am being generous.

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No comments yet.

  1. 27/04/2004Coops says:

    Hmmm, not so sure I agree with you Mitch. Here’s my commentary on your “points”:

    1) Vol 1: It was an action movie (agreed).
    Vol 2: In true Tarantino style, _explained_ the action that was given in the first installment. It gave us Beatrix’s past, and how she became such a great warrior that we saw in the first film. Don’t forget that Kill Bill was originally one film. Perhaps your expectations would have been properly fulfilled if this film hadn’t been split into two parts; that way you would have had both your dose of action while also given an explanation. Too many films these days have too much action and no plot to hold them together (anoyone remember the latest Bond film??). If vol 2 was the same as vol 1 (in the “action department”), the film as a whole would have suffered severly.

    2) I don’t know how you can say that Vol 1 was both an action movie, and had a better plot than vol 2, while also saying vol 2 had plot holes. Is it not Tarantino’s style to give an action sequence, only to explain it in greater detail later? How is it possible for Vol 1 – which set up the action elements for vol 2 to justify – to have no plot holes, when basically none of the plot was revealed? By the end of vol 1 the viewer doesn’t even know the lead’s actual name, let alone how she became proficient in martial arts, how she got pregnant, how the Texas slaughter happened, who Bill was, etc.?

    3) What movie has a better soliloquy in which Bill explains his daughters first experience with death when she stepped on the goldfish? The way Bill described his views on Superhero’s? The analogys he drew completely brought out the emotions experienced by Kiddo and himself, and summarized the plot in probably the most succinct way any movie I have seen has ever done.

    If you didn’t like Kill Bill Vol. 2, I suggest you see the first movie again, then head straight to the cinema and experience the most amazing resolution of plot you will see for a long time.

  2. 27/04/2004Greg says:

    I started watching No1 the other day…and thought “what the????” but by the sounds of it i may have to actually watch the whole thing.

    As for No2, i think i’ll have to get through No1 first. :)

  3. 3/05/2004jay says:

    Mitch i’m afraid i have to disagree with you as well. as much as i luv ya, i completely disagree with you!
    Vol2 was awesome. Vol 1 was explaining everything, why it happened, where, who, the consequences of what was done, etc – but it left you wanting more and saying OMG I CANT WAIT FOR VOL2!!
    Vol2 left me completely satisfied with the story. It filled in the little parts that Vol1 left out, the exact parts that made you want more of it. It wrapped the story up in a neat little bundle of joy. And a happy ending. Which is ultimately what every movie needs.
    The twist of BB still being alive and thinking Kiddo/The Bride/Beatrix (not Beatrice :-p) was brilliantly done.
    Overall I think the entire movie was excellent. Kill Bill Volumes 1 and 2 are by far my favourites now, along with another QT classic, Pulp Fiction, which I absolutely love!

  4. 3/05/2004jay says:

    My mistake –

    The twist of BB still being alive and thinking Kiddo/The Bride/Beatrix (not Beatrice :-p)was sleeping the whole time was brilliantly done.