Big Brother Over, Thank God!by Mitch on 15/08/2005
It’s no secret how much I hate Big Brother and other such reality television shows. The sad part is that they get so much airtime and attention that I actually know what is going on without even watching the show. Since I had to put up with the wanky twats for months, I will take a moment to bitch them off a little. No tears guys, okay?
Greg – One of the twins, possibly the only cool people in the house, but still a knob because he kissed Christie.
Angela – Boring.
Christie – Dead set loser. So hyperactive it’s beyond a joke and her jumping around dance made me want to be sick. I think Greg will one day realize that it was a bad judgement call to go getting into her pants.
Constance – Lied about being single to stay in the house. I think Big Brother only believed it because she is clearly not the catch of the century.
David – Similar to Greg, but no shockers with the ladies. Had the balls to tell it straight.
Dean – Head up his own ass, and sadly, seems to like the smell.
Geneva – Spent entirely too much time complaining about her appearance and, with a gym at her disposal, entirely too little time doing anything about it.
Gianna – Did nothing but talk shit about herself and her accomplishments. Three words sums it up; full of shit.
Glenn – Tried to get a root on national television and failed. Verdict: bonehead.
Heath – How long did he last? 24 hours or some shit? Yeah, what a twat, expericially since Rita outlasted him.
Hotdogs – At least he started some shit now and then, but still a bit up himself.
Kate – I won’t say anything bad about her, because the poor lass had to spend weeks and weeks being chased by old chicken lips himself, Tim.
Melanie – Hot.
Michael – The guy just looked like a told, what else can be said? Loved getting his wang out, which was probably bigger than mine so I won’t kid myself, but it was pretty un-f**king-necessary.
Michelle – Almost knbbed Glenn, but not quite. Prick tease.
Nelson – Hahaha, this tool got busted lying and then tried to act tough by saying he was “only in it for the goodies.” What happened? Evicted! Knob.
Rachael – Hot and at least she got the norks out. Pretty sad when she was singing all by herself in the hot tub, she should have got the ladies out again.
Rita – She’d have been the best in there if she was bound and gagged.
Tim – Just an all-round dickhead. Tried for way too long at scoring Kate, who is sub-par at best. How he made it to second last I just don’t know.
Vesna – Voice like a siren, complained more than any human should and gained weight at an alarming rate from entering to leaving.