3 Reasons to Query Your Telco Bill

by Mitch on 15/03/2006

Tonight I logged on to check my phone bill and noticed it was a bit large and went through some documentation I had here in hard copy. I found a bill saying that I had around $80 overdue on my account and figured that is why it was large and called my Telco (I won’t drom names) to say “whassup?!” It turns out that my charges were legitimate and I just use my phone to much, but the coolest thing happened afterwards.

The operator on the phone asked me politely, “may I take a few minutes of your time and ask your some questions about your service with [Telco]?”

This is where I am supposed to say that my capped plan is awesome and I love making phone calls and text I don’t have to pay for and laugh in the operators face. Instead I realize that the only thing I have to look forward to tonight is trying to code some PHP with a headache so I humor him. “Sure,” I say smoothly and prepare my replies for when he offers me shitty ways to “reduce my bill”.

“How would you like to pay $10 less per month, get another $300 worth of calls, get less expensive calls, be one of the first to try out the 3G network in Australia, AND get a new Nokia N70 phone?”

My wit escapes me and my replies all seem like discarded palm cards as I stutter, “what’s the catch?”

The operator laughs and cooly says, “the same catch we always have here at [Telco], you just have to sign for another 12 months!”

Now, for those of you who are uninitiated: I am a mobile-a-holic. Seriously. I text a lot, I talk a lot and I love the idea of being in touch with people and I use my phone for almost everything. So offering a free phone that has all the latest gadgets to a technophile and a mobile addict is like putting cake in front of a fat kid.

So, the three reasons to query your Telco:

  1. Cheaper shit
  2. New, free and cool phone
  3. I won indoor soccer

Clearly 3 has nothing to do with anything, but I had to put that in there. Take that you little 17 year old twats, we smashed your asses and I feel like such a hero in my own lunchbox!

Sincerely yours,
Signing off,
Mitch

P.S. Rawk! m/

//www.flickr.com/people/bananasontoast/ on flickr.com

Nokia N70, originally uploaded by bananasontoast on flickr.com.

No comments yet.

  1. 15/03/2006Kevin says:

    I went through a similar experience with quite possibly the same telco you aren’t mentioning although it was they who rang me and offered me lots of cheaper phone calls etc from my land line. Of course, I greeted such offers with the greatest of sceptisism and continued working on stuff grunting here and there when required. I think I got changed over to something cheaper by the end of it though.

    I rarely query my landline bill since I really don’t make a lot of little tiny local calls on it – they are mainly to mobiles and STD areas. As for my mobile plan, prepaid on a 4 or 5 year old phone which needs a new battery.

    Oh, free never means free – remember you’re locked in for a whole year.

    Indoor soccer eh? Is that still around?

  2. 16/03/2006Claire says:

    Hey your such a geek! cant expect me to be nice to you hey? Congrats on the indoor win, old guys in lawn bowls one week, 17year old kids for soccer the next, you’re my hero =) lol. told you to take jake. im not even hung over, proud?

  3. 16/03/2006Mitch says:

    Considering you were a little toasted last night, yes I am a little impressed babe! And no, I don’t expect you to be nice to me. 😉

    As for being your hero, get in line sweetheart. It’s not easy out ruining hopes and dreams every night for old and young, but I do a good job.